Depending on our own perspective, high school can be heaven or hell. It was revealed in the pilot episode of 13 Reasons Why that Hannah Baker took her own life and from here we can already tell how high school was for her.
As I have said in my previous posts, I am an introvert. My family, especially my mother, and some of my friends has shown their concern for me. They worry that as I transfer school for senior high I might be an easy target for bullies because of my shyness. My mother worried most about me struggling on having/making new friends, because I don’t really socialize as much as others. In this series, social standing is a one big factor to have a good high school experience, which is totally true in real life but not for me. Unlike most of the teenagers today I don’t get strength and confidence on other people and their opinions. I always find my strength and confidence in God and in the people that are dearest to me, like my family.
At the end of the episode, Clay, the one whom Hannah sent her tapes to, saw Tony as he was going through one of the 13 tapes that was entrusted to him for a certain reason, and asked if why can’t he just tell him what’s on those tapes. Tony wasn’t able to answer his question and has advised him to just “keep listening”. Now to me it is sad that Hannah possibly took her life in order to get everyone’s attention and listen to what she has to say.
The second side of Hannah’s tapes was addressed to her past friend, Jessica. Hannah and Jessica’s friendship started when they were both introduced to each other by the guidance counselor and they clicked immediately. Their friendship came into a sudden halt when Jessica started dating Alex, supposedly their new friend. Their estranged relationship later became more complicated when things turned sour between Alex and Jessica–and Hannah was caught in between. Jessica discovered that Alex was sexually attracted to Hannah which is why she accused her of seducing him behind her back.
As cliche as it may sound, the same thing happened with my own best friend and our circle of friends. My dearest friend had a boyfriend when we were 3rd year in high school. Majority of our common friends didn’t love the idea of them being together and so they decided to give her an ultimatum; it’s either her long time friends or her new found guy. For some reason, she came to me to find some comfort. What I’m trying to emphasize is the relationships that we have at such a young age and the sense of entitlement that we have. It is our responsibility as a friend to guide each other into the right path, but we should always keep in mind that there are boundaries that we must not cross. I see in a lot of teenagers the sense of entitlement they have with their friends. Trying to meddle with one’s decision in life, whether it be good or bad, for me is definitely wrong. I personally think that you communicate with your friend your own thoughts and opinions about her decisions, as an advice that will guide him or her, but leave the final say to them because after all it’s their own life to live and you have yours, too.
Sexual assault is also a kind of bullying. This is all I thought for the whole episode. The “Hot List” made by Alex was made open for the entire school, and if I was Hannah I would definitely feel extreme humiliation and would develop anxiety thinking that men would probably think things with her body in the most degrading way possible. Being a woman is hard because of so many factors but one is that we always worry on getting sexually assaulted, most especially in public places. Sometimes it’s not even because of what you’re wearing nor the time or place you’re in, if it happens it happens, and it is bothering me. That, I think, is what Hannah was exactly feeling at that moment. It is more than just an embarrassment. As we have watched this part of the series I hope that boys and men would come to an understanding that woman must be given the same respect that we give to the male group of the society. I hope that stigma of the past, where women are more of a slave and a source of pleasure, will finally come to an end.
To all the young girls and ladies, there will always be those moments or situations where we will feel disrespected and degraded and we cannot control or prevent the possibility of it happening to us but what we are capable of doing is to stand up for ourselves and fight for our rights and our dignity. It is time to prove all of the stereotypes, that the old generation has given us, wrong.
To all the young boys and men, as per the old stereotypes you guys have is their strength and I hope that it will be used to make us feel safe, secure, and well protected around you.
In this present day, suicide rates are slowly rising. Depression is one of the root cause why, and sadly it is now a very common mental illness. In this episode, Hannah’s parents believes that their daughter’s death could have been prevented. I, myself, suffered with persistent depressive disorder, or dysthymia, for two years. Although it wasn’t as bad as a clinical depression would be, it was still the lowest point I have ever been yet in my life. The hardest part was speaking out because I thought people would either judge or not believe what I would say I’m experiencing. It took me, more or less, a year to finally say what I’m struggling with to my family. My mom, to my surprise, was able to relate herself to me because she also suffered from depression. She was the one that God used to really bring me back to life. If it wasn’t for her I would’ve been in a worse position right now. Speaking out is hard but don’t let your judgements of how people would react stop you from letting out your burden. Reaching out is easy but are we really willing to? Are we sensitive and observant enough to see how our loved ones are doing? I hope so because if we are, a life will be saved from going to waste.
Bullying is a cycle. In this episode we learned about what happened between Courtney and Hannah, that Courtney’s gay, and Tyler publicly posted a blurred picture of Courtney and Hannah making out. If we analyze each character that bullied the late Hannah Baker, we can see that all of them are either bullied, have family issues, or has some social issues. This are what makes a bully. I don’t believe that a person was born a bully. It is how they are brought up by their parents and influenced by the people surrounding them, most especially their friends. Surprisingly, bullying is one of the biggest reason why teenagers are committing suicide. I have watched countless news reporting teens in high school taking their own lives for some hate comments on social media. It does seem petty but its just the surface. I cannot even wrap it up in my head on what other nasty things did his/her classmates did to make him/her decide to just die? It must’ve been worse than you can imagine. Being an advocate is good but making an impact and contributing for a change in this kind of bad trend or practice in schools will stop students/teenagers from even having the thought of just dying.
Summary: Student body president Marcus asks Hannah out and then tries to touch her in a restaurant on their date. He “thought she was easy” and was offended when she rejected him in front of his friends, who he’d invited along to watch. After she pushes him away, he rounds up his buddies and leaves Hannah crying into her milkshake.
I think in this whole series, the things that are happening in Hannah Baker’s life has been repetitive. Since that “HOT LIST” came out to the entire school, thanks to Alex, Hannah has been the center of malicious looks and a subject of multiple sexual harassment/assaults. Me and my cousin had an experience of getting those “looks” from a perverted older man. He is a Public Utility Jeep (PUJ) driver in our village and I’ve noticed that he always gaze intently on every girl/women passenger most especially when they get off the vehicle, he would stare at them as they walk away. It made me uncomfortable whenever, by chance, I happen to ride in his jeep. Only God knows where he is looking at but it makes me think of things that are not so good because why else would he stare behind all of his female passengers’ back? To make sure they don’t trip off or something? It may seem that I’m over reacting but I think its safe to say that it is an instinct. Men out there may say that I’m way too judgmental but this thing are one of those many thing that men wouldn’t really understand unless it happens to them. I don’t think that its in a man to be worried of being groped in crowded place or being raped when they stay out for too late at night but it is for us women. I also don’t think that what women wear is the problem, partly it is, but no matter how conservative your fashion is if there are perverted men, like the one I’m talking about, or sex maniacs out there what happened to Hannah Baker and to all other women who experienced this kind of things in real life will keep on happening again and again. Just like what I’ve said on my reflection in episode 3, the only thing that we can do as a woman is to fight, not only as a physical defense but also for our dignity, for equal rights, and for the respect that we deserve.
Summary: Zach, a jock with a softer side that he hides from his teammates, approaches Hannah in the diner after Marcus leaves and simply sits with her. Later in school, he asks out Hannah from a place of willingness to get to know her. She flatly rejects him, assuming he’s just like all the rest. Once Zach’s ego is wounded, he acts out in a snarky way by stealing “positive notes of encouragement” that others have written to her. More little lifelines are lost and destroyed in the process — a miniscule and petty action for Zach, a major and spirit-crushing loss for Hannah.
Someone who experienced pain might drive them to hurt others. Just take note of how Zach acted when Hannah hurt his ego. I have been a witness to this kind of people who always like to get even. This kind of attitude is most common in the social media realm nowadays. People, most especially teenagers, feel empowered when they earn likes and followers, say their thoughts, or lash out at someone in social media but to me they all look like a coward, to which they are, hiding behind their computers and cellphones. I believe that it is alright to say your thoughts to a person, whether it be a positive or a negative one, but be sure say on their faces not behind their back or say nothing at all because then you’ll look like a stupid person talking to someone without them even knowing. And even if what your posting is real why would you post something that you know would ruin someone’s reputation? Why not address it to the person through a private conversation and maybe give them a chance to explain themselves and maybe change their attitude? Although, I know that it is now hard to change this kind of practice in social media beware that what you are doing, whether good or bad, will someday come back to you as a blessing or as a curse, and believe it or not it will run down to the future generations in your family and that is called KARMA.
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